Baby in His Arms Read online

  She waved him off. “I’m okay, thanks though.”

  She looked away and pushed herself up, crouching, then standing. Noah had already moved away, ordering a sedative for the patient. Security was gently but firmly holding the man onto the bed, for staff safety they said, but for the patient’s own as well. The nurses went to work as if nothing violent had occurred, following through Noah’s orders. Afton worked on her breathing. This was so silly, all she could to was remind herself to inhale, exhale while the rest of the staff carried on like the professionals they were.

  A daze impaired her mind, birthed equally by Noah’s presence and the violence. Suddenly, all went quiet in the room as the patient succumbed to the sedative.

  “You can do that IV now.”

  Debby glanced at her from across the bed as she wrapped a blood pressure cuff on the patient’s arm. Afton swallowed hard and moved back to the cart.

  Noah had his back to her as he examined the patient. His frame was commanding and perfectly filling out his black scrubs. Wide shoulders, muscular back, a backside that made women lose their minds. If he took off his scrub cap, she’d see finger-combed hair in fractured hues of gold.

  “Didn’t expect to see you again so soon, Bruce.” Noah moved to the other side of the bed, facing Afton as he bent to look inside the patient’s ear with an otoscope. “Don’t worry. We’ll take good care of you as usual.”

  The patient, Bruce, blinked but started straight ahead. His breaths rose and fell in a steady, rhythmic pattern, arms relaxed at his sides. And then his eyelids lowered. Afton breathed in relief. Thank God for sedatives.

  She went about preparing her supplies. The hairs on her forearms stood up, heat flushing over her as Noah came around the bed to stand next to her. He was so much taller than her, so fit and... sexy.

  Isn’t that how she’d gotten tangled up with him in the first place?

  She glanced at him beneath half-lowered lashes. She’d been minding her own business, sitting in a beach chair where sand turned into grass, watching a swarm of twenty-somethings living it up like wild animals on the beach.

  They were wasted, girls flashing their breasts; guys chugging beer until their bare chests were slick with it.

  She’d quietly observed, sipping a bottled water, in a conservative bikini top and cut-off shorts, minding her own business... until she’d dozed off and then suddenly Noah wandered by, barefoot and bare chested, showing off his amazing physique in a pair of lime green board shorts. Her heart had flipped as he walked past, then turned with a brilliant smile and motioned to her beat-up old canvas knapsack with the National Public Radio ‘NPR’ logo on the front.

  “Afton, over here please.”

  She looked to Debby calling her name. She caught Noah’s eyes in the process. His forehead wrinkled, his gaze steadfast and riveting, searching, as if he was trying so damn hard to remember. Was he trying to remember her? God, what would happen if he did? She moved, intending to go to Debby on the other side of the bed. But he blocked her path, his hip turned toward her and taking up all the space between his body and the IV cart. And his eyes weren’t letting her go.

  “Excuse me, Doctor Crisler.” She’d thought the words, but had they come out of her mouth?

  He squared up with the bed, creating a path for her escape. Not daring to look at him again, she hurried to Debby’s side, willing the adrenaline in her body to settle, for her pulse to slow.

  And Jesus, for the ache between her legs to go back into hibernation.

  “Bruce is a frequent flyer. He’s overdosed on opioids again. EMS found him unconscious and barely breathing. They gave him some Narcan to help him breathe better, but unfortunately he got a little too much and medication kicked him out of his high and now he’s pissed off.”

  Debby looked for a suitable vein on the patient’s arm. “Rule number one of Narcan: give enough to help the patient breathe, but never enough to wake them up or you’ll have a demonic possession on your hands.”

  “Good to know.”

  “Okay, I see where I’d start his IV, but you find a spot for yourself. Do your thing and I’ll observe.”

  Afton wrapped a tourniquet around Bruce’s arm, her hearing sharpening as Noah began quietly speaking to another nurse. He was giving orders, the reverberation of his near-whisper sending shivers down Afton’s spine.

  “Dr. Crisler,” the nurse said, looking her way. “I’ll have the Afton do it. Good experience.”

  His eyes were on her again, grabbing her, pulling her in... with a nod, he walked out of the room.

  Debby waiting until Noah had pulled the curtain before she raised one eyebrow and called out to the other nurse. Afton looked back to her IV.

  “Is Crisler still going out with that bitch?”

  “I saw them together last night, and they looked pretty cozy. So, I’d say yes. Did you hear he closed on that condo in the Florida Keys?”

  Afton tried not to listen, but to concentrate as she held the catheter above Bruce’s vein, hand trembling.

  “Wow, did he? And he’s going to Berlin the end of next month.”

  “Is he taking the bitch with him?”

  “Pfft. She won’t be around much longer. He’ll probably go solo and find himself a Heidi Klum stand-in while he’s there. The man’s got the world on a string. He’s not going to settle down.”

  Afton pushed away their conversation and focused on what she was doing. She steadied her hand and slid the IV catheter into place. She hurried to finish up, afraid her hands would start shaking again. They were right; Noah had the world on a string. There was no room for a baby in his life. He’d lived oblivious of his daughter this long; what was the harm in continuing that? Just because he’d suddenly appeared in her life didn’t mean she had to tell him.

  The same bitter sensation she’d gotten in her throat when talking to her father this morning returned. She was in protective mode, her brain conjuring rationale for keeping things the way there were. She didn’t want her family to change. She and Kylie were managing. But... was it fair to Noah to never know about his daughter?

  There was always a chance he’d want to be involved in her life, muddying their current routine with child support, and visitation court, lawyer fees, and all the stress that came with it. Noah was a respected physician with money and resources. She was a new nurse, at the bottom of the pay scale, barely making ends meet. What chance would she ever have to go against him in court?

  Nausea churned in her gut.

  “Doing okay over here?”

  Debby came over and peered over her shoulder. She checked Afton’s work, gave a nod of satisfaction and handed her an iPad.

  “Here are the labs Dr. Crisler ordered for Bruce. I’ll show you how to put them into the system.”

  The labs turned into one task after another that kept Afton running in different directions for the next several hours. She was forced to shove worries about Noah to the back burner which she was grateful for. They finally broke for lunch. Starving, Afton hurried to find something to eat in the cafeteria.

  Maddie joined her just as she’d sat with a ham sandwich.

  “I barely saw you all morning.” Maddie moved things around on her salad.

  “It’s nuts in there.”

  “I’ve given two enemas, helped with a gunshot wound, and nearly delivered a baby.”

  “Impressive.”

  “How about you?”

  Came face to face with my daughter’s secret baby daddy. Got way too sexually excited about it. She took a bite to keep the words from coming out. She shrugged.

  “Drug overdose. Couple of congestive heart failures, a rash and a bunch of kids with head lice.”

  Afton’s phone buzzed from her bag. She glanced down and grabbed it, always afraid it was the babysitter.

  It was her father.

  Clicking the ignore button, she put the phone back.

  “So far, I’ve been terrified exactly one-hundred times that I was going to do somethin
g wrong and get booted.” Maddie poked a cherry tomato. “I swear nothing can get in my way right now.”

  She looked at Afton for some sign of agreement.

  But Afton’s lips were cold, numb. Her appetite was gone. Getting booted would be very bad. As in, no rent payment, or student loan funds, or groceries for the baby, bad.

  “I mean, I’m 30. The oldest one in orientation. It took me six years to get through nursing school. I don’t have the time to fail, you know? I’m not getting any younger. You though, you’re what? 25?”

  “24 and fresh out of college last week.”

  Maddie splayed her hands. “Something about you tells me that you don’t have room to fail, either.”

  Afton set down her sandwich. Her life had already gone way off track. She’d lost her mother. Failed her medical school entrance exam, then had gotten pregnant and booted out of her father’s house. She’d lost most of her friends, had to scramble money together for an apartment, a babysitter, tuition. And now the student debt was piling up, and the bills were barely getting paid. Her daughter needed food, clothes, a roof over her head. Worse... she had to learn to be a mother without her own to show her the way.

  “I don’t.” Afton tried to smile, but it was half-assed.

  Maddie raised her bottle of water and encouraged Afton to do the same. She tapped them together. “Here’s to not fucking this up.”

  “Here, here!” A smile pulled her lips this time and some tension melted out of her shoulders.

  Afton’s phone beeped again. Because she had to check it, just in case, she glanced at it. Her father again. And her break was over. Stuffing the phone away, Afton gathered her things and stood. She waved to Maddie, tossed her trash and headed back toward the Emergency Room.

  Four hours to go, and she could go home and hold little Kylie tight.

  She was almost to the employee locker room when a shadow caught her attention from the corner of her eye.

  “Excuse me.”

  Noah approached with an uncertain smile as if he were slightly embarrassed over what he was about to say. Her entire body flushed hot as he stopped in front of her. People milled around them, but she barely noticed. He towered over her, the breadth of his shoulders strong and begging her to hold on to them. She already knew how fuck-hot he looked without clothes, yet his black scrub top fit him like it was made to hug every inch of his athletic frame.

  Her pulse picked up, budding desire rising into something else. Something just as potent.

  Apprehension.

  “Afton, it’s driving me a little mad. I’m wondering, have we met? Outside of the hospital?”

  Her hand tightened around the strap of her canvas bag. She looked different from the last time they’d met. She’d cut her long red hair, opting for shoulder-length, platinum blonde. She was heavier, her chest bigger. It was a blessing and a small curse that he didn’t know her. She wanted him to. But it would only cause mountainous problems if he did.

  “I—I guess it’s possible.”

  “You really look like someone I know, but I can’t place it.”

  She shrugged and moved to step away. “We all have a twin and all that.”

  Her hairline began to tingle. She really needed to get out of his space. The strap of her bag began to cut into her shoulder. Slipping it down, she turned the bag around and put it on the other shoulder. The movement drew his attention. He eyed her bag... his expression twisting as his breathing kicked up.

  She glanced down, her heart falling to her feet. Never, had she imagined her stupid knapsack would call her out. Fuck the damn NPR bag her mom had given her!

  “Are—are you? Wait a minute.” Noah let out a breath. He adjusted his scrub cap like he needed something to do with his hands.

  He stepped close enough that one more step would bring their bodies into contact. “Cabo Girl?”

  An unnatural sound squeaked from her throat. “Uh...”

  Jesus, what was happening? The room was getting way too small. Someone had turned up the fucking heat.

  “Excuse me, are you Afton Henningsen?” A small Asian woman stood with her hands lightly folded in front of her, a pleasant smile on her face.

  Noah didn’t step back, didn’t give her any space.

  Her mouth was dry, barely able to form words. “Yes. Yes, I am.”

  “Oh, very good.” The woman held out a tiny hand. “I’m Myrna. I’m here to talk to you about taking your baby.”

  Chapter Four

  The discomfort on Afton’s face made Noah’s middle clench.

  This woman couldn’t be Cabo girl. A baby? The woman he’d spent an incredible night with last summer wasn’t a mother. Her body had been too tight, her skin too smooth. Sure, maybe she wasn’t working out as much; maybe her body had simply changed, offering up new, smooth curves.

  It was unlikely these women were the same.

  This beauty with the platinum hair wasn’t her. The woman he’d met had had long, reddish blonde hair and a dazzling smile. Afton was beautiful, but she wasn’t as vibrant. She looked... tired, stressed. No, Cabo Girl had been a force of nature.

  They’d shared street tacos and ended up in her darkened hotel room where they spent the rest of their time together immersed in touch and feel. Sure, the lights had been low. And he’d watched her face as she came and writhed beneath him. The sex had completely floored him, rocked him in a way he was still searching to replicate.

  “I’m sorry, I already have a babysitter.” Afton’s voice fractured and filled with disdain.

  “I understand that, miss. Your father sent me to discuss a more full-time option.”

  “I’m not interested. Please, I’m in the middle of my work day. You need to leave.”

  Her gaze flitted to him, filled with an emotion he couldn’t read. She blinked and for a beat, looked completely terrified. Aware that none of this was his business, Noah stepped back. He’d apologize to Afton later, but right now he wanted to separate himself and give her privacy. His mind flooded with moments he’d shared with the woman in Cabo. She’d been a force, blowing him over completely before he’d walked out the way he had.

  The way he’d had to. Even though he’d not once forgotten her in all this time. A nagging sensation forced him to glance back over his shoulder. Afton tucked hair behind her ear, giving him her profile. The shape of her lips, the soft point on the tip of her nose and feminine rise of her cheek taunted him.

  It had all happened so fast. But Jesus Christ, if he wasn’t convinced it wasn’t her, he might be convinced it was her. That fucking backpack after all. How many of them could there be? He needed to get a good, unadulterated look at her. To take in the sound of her voice. To get her alone and absorb her.

  Maybe to feel her touch.

  And then he’d know.

  His cell beeped inside his pocket with a reminder that he had a meeting in ten. His mind shifted from memories to potential problems. He hadn’t been told what the meeting was about, just when to show up. He hoped it was for an update on his status as interim head of emergency medicine, with the green light to make it a permanent. He’d been working his ass off to show he was the right man for the position.

  An uneasy sensation settled beneath his ribs. Hopefully this had nothing to do with the social media nightmare that, for the most part, had died off and been swept under the rug. He’d done nothing wrong, but Noah couldn’t stop the constant feeling that the other shoe was going to drop, and the whole thing would crawl out of its shallow grave.

  He headed to the administration board room. Tom Clements, his mentor and head of the hospital board shook his hand as he entered the room.

  “Noah, good to see you. Please, have a seat.”

  He pulled out a plush chair from the long, mahogany table across from Tom and sunk into it. It didn’t get by him that Tom remained standing.

  “I hope you have some good news?” Noah kept his voice light.

  Tom didn’t smile as normal. His face rarely changed exp
ression. His voice did all the emotional convey. As it were, Tom had been supportive during Noah’s relationship issues turned social media nightmare. He’d recruited him heavily to step into the interim director position and had been grooming him to take it over permanently. Keeping the scandal under wraps had been priority one.

  “Well, we have some news.”

  There it was, the hint of a sour expression on Tom’s face. Noah sat straighter. Shit. This meeting wasn’t going to be what he’d hoped.

  “There’s been a new post, and to say it’s disturbing is an understatement.”

  Noah clenched his hands.

  “When?”

  “Yesterday. I assumed you weren’t getting those internet alerts anymore, or you would have come to me.”

  No, he’d turned off all internet alerts that had anything to do with Deena G. and her nonsense. He’d had to, for his own mental health. The hospital legal team assured him they were on top of it. Despite warring with himself over letting up the control, he’d consented to let them handle it. They’d be his watchdogs, and they’d attack on anything that popped up.

  He took a steadying breath. “What is she saying this time?”

  Tom produced a folder from beneath his arm, paused before opening it and dropping pictures onto the table. Images of bloody white towels and a woman showing her bare feet peeking from beneath a hospital-type gown lay before him.

  “This came from Legal this morning.”

  Noah thumbed through them, his stomach bottoming out. They looked as if they’d been printed from a social media site. The pictures had a caption bar across the middle of the image, each with a different message.

  This is what a miscarriage looks like.

  I did it alone. Like he would’ve been there, anyway.

  Pray for me.

  Noah blinked, unsure what to say. What to feel. An awkward silence hung between them, a pause he should have utilized to try to make sense of what he’d just seen. But everything seemed numb. Dead inside.